Shut The Door
by girlwonderrobyn
Summary: Dick comes to a realisation that Roy finds hard to admit.


The atmosphere in the room was intense, bitter, choking and there was a fierce aura around both men. Then again, It always was when they argued like this. They were getting tedious, these arguments. Very pointless. They both knew how this ended as they'd been through it millions of times. And frankly, it was getting on not only their nerves; but the people around them too; friends, family and even co-workers. The scum on the streets, the underbelly of the city, even they could tell when certain vigilante's had had a frustrating day (and of course, they'd poke fun at those vigilante's without realising it's them who is going to get the beating).

The Outlaws had been off-world again.

This time; almost five months away from Earth. And, on Earth, in the U.S., specifically the city of Bludhaven, Roy's home was with Dick. The two's "love story" was known by the entire superhero community (they weren't exactly keeping it quiet).

Recently (seven months ago), Roy and Dick decided to spend the rest of their lives together and exchange rings the old fashion way with a twist of superhero to it.

But that dream came crashing down into reality when Dick was still waiting after the third month had passed without his fiancé.

Roy drummed his fingers as he looked out at the city's night life, stood against the balcony wall, when Dick came out with it.

"We're not working.." Dick murmured under his hands. Richard's hands were covering his face and he was sitting on the edge of the couch restlessly. His hair was a mess and he was obviously in the middle of changing out of his work uniform when their clash began.

"What?" Roy must've misheard him. He stepped back into the living room, closing the French balcony doors behind him. He was now standing on the opposite side of the coffee table to Dick with his eyebrows curved down in an angry frown. Dick took his hands away from his face and dropped them in his lap before he spoke again.

"We're not working." he stated, looking up at Roy with agonising and exhausted eyes.

"You're spouting shit again, Grayson, It's pissing me off-"

"Roy, I'm serious." Dick rose from the couch "look at us." he gestured to the space gap between them, "look at what we're doing. Look back on how this argument, the same argument, is practically a scheduled TV show!" he dropped his hands to his sides. "Look at me Roy." Dick pleaded, stepping around the coffee table.

"Fuck, Dick! This is bullshit, I won't listen to you bawling about shit that's not even true! We're just blowing off steam like we always do!" Roy shoved passed him, grunting as their shoulders knocked together "I'm done with this conversation-". Dick swung his arm around and gripped his shoulder tight, wrenching the older man back to face him.

"Well I'm not done! Will you just fucking listen to me!" Dick yelled, panting a little. When Dick cursed, Roy knew to at least pay attention to him even if he made it look like he wasn't. "Roy.. I've been fighting with myself for two months over this because I was thinking the same way as you are now, but.. look at where we are right now." Dick took his hand off Roy and dropped it to his side again. "You're with Jason and Kory, you guys have a thing and you're dedicated to it's cause no matter what. No- look at me! I'm not blaming you! Listen.. I'm proud of you, of what you fight for. But that's just it. You're with your team for months and- and we were supposed to get married.." Dick's tongue was getting tied so Roy spoke for him.

"I know and I'm sorry but you said that it was okay if we moved the date-"

"Exactly! I was okay with putting our lives together on hold for your mission. That's not what couples do.." Dick's voice was straining in his throat as he spoke. "We need our second lives and we need them more than we need each other. And if you want to blame anyone for that it's us for not realising this and getting out of It sooner". Roy wasn't looking at Dick (which was getting on Dick's nerves) but he was listening. He couldn't look; he already knew the face Dick was pulling and he if even peaked at Dick's face right now he too might start believing what Dick was talking about.

"I think getting married was a mis-"

"No, shut up! Don't you dare say it!" he hissed and snapped his head to him.

"It's a mistake!"

The room fell silent but the atmosphere heated up again only this time, with anguish. Because Roy knew that is was true. It was a couple of minutes later that Dick turned his whole body away from Roy so that his back was facing him.

"So, what?" Roy shrugged heavily, "what does that mean, we're not gonna get married?" he stared at Dick longing for an answer and wishing he'd turn around. Because Dick always did this. He was still running.

"No." Dick's voice cracked so he repeated his louder, "no. We're not going to be together" he spoke slowly, rubbing his thumb over his engagement ring. Dick said nothing else.

"Dick.. do you mean we won't be together.. at all.." Roy struggled to get all of that out. Dick was silent again so Roy called his name once more. Dick was twisting his ring off slowly. He chuckled sadly and clutched the ring in his hand.

"Just think of it this way, now, when you're off world, you won't have me holding you back" Dick bit his bottom lip as tears leaked down the sides of his face.

"But.. It's knowing that you're home for me-"

"Don't say anything else because you know where it will get us" Dick turned back around. Seeing him like this, it broke Roy's heart. Dick smiled at him then looked down at his hand and then opened his hand and hovered it in between them. "Take it. Save it."

"No-"

"Roy please!" he begged and grit his teeth, tear drops soaking the carpet, "it'll constantly remind me of what we could be and I can't take that!" he brought his free hand up to his mouth and clamped his mouth shut.

"Dick.. keep it. I can't face looking at it again.. I'll just see your face.. and If you want me to get over you-" Roy found it very hard to talk like this "-then, I can't have it..". Dick sucked in a very long breathe then looked back up at him, nodding.

"Okay.." he swallowed, taking his hand away from his face. He put the ring back in his pocket so he could put it in the drawer later. "So.. we're.."

"I'll go pack my stuff" he said and walked out of the room. Dick closed his eyes then walked backwards to the couch and dropped down onto it, covering his face again.

An hour and half later and Roy had everything he needed. It didn't take him that long because most of Roy's stuff was in his own apartment. He walked back into the living room and dropped his bag by the front door. He was carrying a photo frame of them in his hand. Dick stood up, rubbing his face. He let out a breathe and wiped his hands on his pants. He looked at Roy who seemed lost and he just hugged him.

For a second, it was almost like they weren't going to let go of each other. It took all the strength Dick had to pull away.

"Get out of here before we change our minds again" Dick sniffed, a small smile on his lips. Roy had the urge to kiss his cheek before he left but he couldn't do it. Dick wasn't leaving for work. Roy was leaving forever.

"So... I guess I'll see you around then Shortpants.." he said with a small forced chuckle.

"Maybe.." he said, hoping that the 'no' came through in his voice. "Be careful out there Roy. Keep an eye on Jay for me" he said and held onto the open door that Roy had opened.

Roy stood in front of him like the first time he'd stood at this door, begging Dick to forget about work that night and go out with him. Dick had said yes. Roy clutched the frame harder, the glass was about to break. "Goodbye Dick" he said then took the first step away.

"Bye.." Dick couldn't get anymore word out. He just shut the door.

Shut the door on the life that would've made him in the happiest he's ever been.


End file.
